New SJP line available at Steve and Barry's??!!

Sarah Jessica Parker has launched a range of clothes and accessories.
Named 'Bitten by SJP', the clothes will be stocked in budget store Steve and Barry's. The range due to go on sale June 7th, features over 400 pieces in four categories- Classics, Casual, Trend and Lounge.

When is this madness going to end? Has everyone forgotten that it was actually stylist Pat Field that made the whole Sex and the City crew look awesome?

Enough with the celebs thinking they can have ranges, perfume etc- it's tacky. And secondly, maybe SJP's time would be better spent concentrating on her movie choices- Failure to Launch was possibly the worst movie ever made!

Ok, glad I go that out of my system. I promise I won't bring my soap box into work tomorrow.

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Semi-nude male models... just because. Part 2

It's that time of the month again- no, you wish... isn't bleeding from it's vag- it's time for our second instalment of our wildly popular series- 'semi-nude male models...just because'.

Does one need a reason to look at half naked models? Certainly not at this website. In fact, Georgie and I have actually made a pact, that we wouldn't let one day go by, without looking at, at least one half naked model. And It would just kill me to let her down...

I've just spent the last hour tirelessly searching through the runway shows to bring you the freshest of the fresh, of scantily clad male models. So sit back, get your finger on the scroll bar, and make sure your boss isn't standing behind you...

Enjoy.

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Rehab is for quiters- Marc Jacobs checks in

Marc Jacobs has just booked into rehab. He's staying in Arizona, of course (makes sense being the desert, dry etc). Marc was sober for seven years before this relapse. Isn't the best thing about being in the fahsion industry, the fact that people won't judge you for your excessive ways. I guess they got a little too excessive... Poor Marky Marc.

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Madonna for H&M- what the clothes look like

A quick look at what Madonna's new line for H&M will look like. I have to say it's all a little underwhelming. None of the items are particularly exciting... Yawn.

Perhaps this is what happens when celebrity 'guest' designers actually design their own range, as opposed to their stylist doing it all for them. Anyway, I'm such a downer, what do you think of it?

P.S. In case you missed it, below is the full TVC she made for her collection.
I don't know what the fuck it's all about, but then I seem to feel that way any time I watch Madonna act.



P.P.S. Just for comparison's sake I've also included the commercial they made for Stella McCartney's H&M range. Again, doesn't make too much sense re: girl in bird cage, but at least it's got a catchy tune and bright colours throughout (I'm like a child- so easily entertained)

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Girl loses eye in Stella for Target mayhem

Stella McCartney's range for Target(Australia) was launched today. According to numerous sources it wasn't a pretty site as the store was ransacked, and left empty in less than 5 minutes!

And many are saying that ebay is to blame for the 42-piece range disappearing so quickly. Apparently, smart little fashionistas were ripping the clothes of the racks like dogs tearing flesh from a leg of lamb, and then placing the items on the auction site for 5 times the original price. Just terrible. All these young ladies turning into vicious Heather Mills, beating off fellow customers with their prosthetic legs, just to make a quick buck. Linda would be rolling in her vegetarian grave.

Below is a look at some of the pieces available. Do you think they were they worth the bumfight?

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Unkle Karl Pic of the Week- Let's hike!

And you thought hikers were unfashionable! Not Unkle Karl. This bitch won't step foot in a National Park unless dressed head to toe in Dior Homme.

And let me tell you , once Unkle Karl gets walking, there is no stopping him. Karl did the Kokoda trail in half a day and then designed 3 collections, before night fall, without breaking so much as a sweat on his botoxed little brow. Don't be fooled thinking it was his diet that helped him lose all that weight.

I believe this photo was taken somewhere around the base camp of 'Mount Kanchenjunga', in Nepal. Karl personal delivered fabric swatches to starving children in a local village. He's like the Mother Teresa of the fashion world.
You may notice he's not wearing he signature gloves in this photo. That's because, in an act of utter selflessness, he gave them to a young boy suffering from Malaria. The fact the boy really needed anti-viral medication is irrelevant. Because at the end of the day anyone can be healthy, but only a select few can be HOT. And if there is one thing Karl knows about, it's hotness. For the few minutes before his liver failed him and he slipped into a coma, that boy would have been the coolest kid in his village. Could medication have done that? I. Don't. Think. So.

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Good Lord

This pic was taken at the Miu Miu show in Paris this week.

The model (named Masha) looked a little frightened walking down the runway.

Maybe Miuccia Prada stuck a pin in her arse before she went out!

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Paris Fall RTW- Crazy John's fashion show

It was fright night at the John Galliano show over the weekend in Paris. Models dressed as if they had crawled out of the ground, strutted down the runway in vintage inspired dresses.

Make-up extraordinaire Pat McGrath, didn't so much 'provided' make-up for the girls as, 'grab them by the back of their heads and pound their faces into her make-up case'.

Bruised zoombie hookers, are so chic right now.

"What me drunk?...(burp, little spew) are yooouusssee crazy?... I'm just having a good night out in my little black dress of despair, nusssing tooo worrry about!"

Imagine waking up in the middle of the night and seeing this scary bitch staring down at you? I'm getting shivers just thinking about it. Put her back in the clown cemetery where you found her John!

"S'up bitches? Yeah I'm dead and shit, you gotta a mother fucking problem with that? Quit looking at me like you never seen a battered and bruised deceased bitch strutting down a runway... you making me uncomfortable."

"Just popping down to the shop to get some ingredients for my brew! 1 teaspoon of my dead lovers tears, 1 cup of semen from the scrotum of an angry Irish man and the toe nails of a banished Mormon. Thank god for 7-11 I say!"

And then the man himself wandered out in what can only be described as an 'eclectic' outfit. Gumboots, pyjamas, rake and vest covered in war medals and flowers certainly says, 'welcome to Looneyville, population 1, where the buffet serves nothing but crazy salad and nutcase fondue.' But then we'd expect nothing less from John. And what a boring place it'd be without him.

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Vogue cover material?

Kate Moss and boyfriend Pete Doherty are set to be the cover stars of the April, American Vogue.

The cover is apparently been shot by famed photog Mario Testino! Wowsers...

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Magazine Monday- what's going on here?

Welcome to a new week. And what better way to start the grind than with a couple of head scratches. Young Dancer and Flaun+, are two magazines that couldn't be any more different, yet have one big thing in common- that been that neither of their covers make any sense at all...

It took me a really long time to figure out-

a) what the headline read.

and

b) who was the strange upside down man on the cover.

After staring at this for so long my brain started to hurt I worked out the answer to both these questions. If you haven't figured it out yet, the guy on the front is Alec Baldwin. And the headline seems to read 'War and Mo, and Mo and Me'. The only problem was that even after figuring this out I STILL HAD NO IDEA WHAT THE HELL WAS GOING ON! So many questions left unanswered, why is he upside down? Whose Mo? And what does this Mo have to do with Alec... or war? And which war are they talking about? Iraq? Vietnam? The goddamn Crimean War of 1854?

As frustrating as it all is, perhaps that was the magazines' master plan. Make a cover so obscure and confusing that befuddled customers, at the magazine section of Borders, would be forced to buy the thing simply to find out what it's all about. But not me, I shall just force myself to live with the uncertainty and unanswered questions, that I've so often come to expect from Alec Baldwin.

Besides been the cheapest looking thing I have ever seen, the cover for this month's Young Dancer is also rather worrying. I mean, is the girl on the front cover alright? She looks as though she's fallen and can't get up. Her wrist appears to be snapped in half and her face looks worryingly pained. What sort of sadistic editor would choose such a moment, to document for their front cover? And then to mock her with the headline- 'Lauren Curran Jumps for Joy. What makes this girl dance?' Quite clearly, nothing will be making young Lauren dance for at least the next six weeks. But hopefully when she gets the plaster off, Lauren will finally jump for joy and tap her way on to the next cover of Young Dancer in a triumphant come-back issue, the likes of, the dancing community has never seen! Go Lauren, go!

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